So like it's hard? When people? Ask you to like, as such, do things that are, as such, hard? For the children? When there are numbers involved?

The good people of Cheat Neutral help you, because you can't help yourself. For the bargain price of $5, you can offset the bad vibes your romantic infidelity pumps into the cosmos. No word yet on bulk purchasing for corporations or members of Congress.

Beachcoming was a pretty hairy prospect until Frank Sack grabbed the problem by the short & curlies with the Tuft-B-Gone.

Who's your big daddy of theoretical physics? Aw yeah - Hawk's verified the location of a black hole, and he's singularly obsessed with its emissions.

Shake, baby, shake. Good for go-go. Not so much ga-ga. And if your baby's an Etch-A-Sketch, you've got bigger problems than than the occasional terrible twosie tantrum.

The lost Olsen triplet is only half the girl she used to be, thanks to her fame-hungry siblings.

As a matter of fact, I am talking about your vagina.

Hot on the heels of the Pirates of the Carribean franchise's success, the Magic Kingdom is tapping its other thrill rides for cinematic potential. No word on how wild Mr. Toad will go on the silver screen, but there's gotta be a reason he's got all those warts.

Diamonds are forever. Restraining orders - not so much.

Dinner, dancing and wallaby watching are a snap for Billy - especially when he tries to be a stand-up guy.

Taking advice from animals - dandy if you're Calvin & Hobbes. Not so much if you're David Berkowitz. Marx & Sun nestle somewhere twixt the two.