Who's your big daddy of theoretical physics? Aw yeah - Hawk's verified the location of a black hole, and he's singularly obsessed with its emissions.

Shake, baby, shake. Good for go-go. Not so much ga-ga. And if your baby's an Etch-A-Sketch, you've got bigger problems than than the occasional terrible twosie tantrum.

Karen's just become a woman, and her whole family's decided to go with the flow.

The lost Olsen triplet is only half the girl she used to be, thanks to her fame-hungry siblings.

Aw hon - they're not laughing AT you. They're laughing WITH you. And sometimes, they're hiding in your house laughing with you until either the little pills or the white-coated men make them go away.

The aptly-named "Rob" has taken to a life as a "polite mugger". One can only imagine he'll go on to bigger and and better crimes: eloquent carjacker, magnanimous burglar, attorney general...

It's a hardcore, uncensored Michael Showalter Showalter showdown when Paul Rudd gets Randy all over his interview with, uh, Michael Showalter.

Infanticide may *seem* like a really fun afternoon's pastime and all, but it tends to lead to awkward questions, so you probably shouldn't do it. Probably.

Instead, consider sending one of Big Flux's painfully verité e-cards. Kill time. Not, you know, babies.

Imus got busted for his racist rhetoric, so Rhett & Link think it's time for a ho-down.

The Tomball Predators' star rookie hits a grand slam at the post-game press rundown. Good thing, considering he's debased himself out on the field.